First of all, if you have not read Part 1, you can read it
here.
Second of all, while it is not easy to open up and put myself out there, in less than 24 hours since I posted part 1 I have had a great number of personal messages of love, support, and "I've been there, too!" It is so nice to be embraced (figuratively) and to share experiences together. Thank you!
On to Part 2:
So now that I am officially done with school, a lot of what I do (and post) is going to be geared towards getting ready for a baby. This is not a pregnancy announcement. (I wish!) But cleaning and organizing the house, changing my habits, physical and mental cleansing, and saving money and getting out of debt-these are all goals for today so that someday next year (I hope!) we will have a baby and we will be as squared away and prepared as possible.
On that note, I decided to get my annual physical (it has been a few years) and start seeing an OBGYN. "Pre-pregnancy counseling" is what they call it. The Nurse Practitioner I saw was really great, although I confess it is a little awkward to talk about sex (sorry, no storks at this house.) One of the first things she asked me is "how often do you exercise?"
"Rarely," I reply. "But with school and work I am so busy, and I work a lot of days and nights and it is just really hard," I stammer, trying to justify my lack of physical activity.
"You need to get moving." she says. "Now that school is done, you need to focus on you. You have been focusing on taking care of everyone else and now you have to take care of yourself. In fact, that's the first thing I am writing you a prescription for. Exercise." Ewww, the "E" word!
"Okay." I laugh a little. It's hard to hear that I need to take care of myself, even though that should be a given. I can't help that I'm so giving and loving of others ;) "And you should try to lose a little weight. It will be better for you when you get pregnant." And there it is. The thing I knew she would say but was hoping she wouldn't. Lose some weight.
I left the doctor's office feeling a little down. I've tried to get healthy and lose weight several times but my efforts have only lasted a few days. It is hard to get a routine going when my work shifts rotate between day and night. But that is still no excuse. Healthy living is a choice. And boy do I love eating sweets and junk food and watching tv.
But on with the story. So I was feeling a little down after my appointment. Sometimes the truth hurts. So in self-pity I posted this on facebook:
"I guess it is really real when the doctor tells you to lose weight before getting pregnant *feeling fat*"
I had no idea this would become such a controversial statement. There were several people who commented about what they do to keep fit or try to lose weight. There are a lot of options, after all. Then there were several people who seemed to think it was ridiculous for my doctor to suggest weight loss and that weight is a societal misnomer, as if the numbers on the scale mean nothing. Some people are very passionate about society's view of body image. Especially when I never said anything about trying to get skinny. Everyone has an opinion. My reply to everyone was this:
"I thank everyone for the words of encouragement but I think it is extreme to suggest I get a different doctor because she said I should exercise more and try to lose some weight. Isn't it a doctor's job to encourage us to be healthier? And while I agree that weight isn't an end-all-be-all health measurement, it is obvious that I am overweight and I know I am not in a healthy place. I am surprised more of you weren't encouraging me to be healthier for my future baby rather than saying it is ok to get pregnant when you are obese. I was a little down after my doctor appointment but it was not new information. Now I have started the 6 week summer slimdown and I am motivated to make healthier food choices and start exercising...I took 9 flights of stairs to work and resisted the donuts! 1 day at a time..."
Now, I am not perfect by any means. I have a long way to go before having healthy habits. But I can try each and every day to be better. And if I make 1 bad food choice or don't exercise, then I will do better the next day and not give up. Maybe this doctor visit was the push I needed to make some real changes. I am excited for the 6 Week Summer Slimdown to help keep me motivated and help me get to a healthier place. Here is my before picture:
The goal is to lose 6% of my body weight in 6 weeks. For me that is about 13 pounds or around 2 pounds per week. This is totally doable! I will keep you posted on my progress.
Craftnanigans & Snazzysauce